Tuesday, March 19, 2013

And the day came ...

“... when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”  Anaïs Nin

Last weekend I attended a personal growth course with David Wood.  Well known for his work with T. Harv Eker and the Millionaire Mind seminars, he is now a formidable trainer for Isagenix and his events are not to be missed.

This is the second time I’ve done one of these with David, and I wondered if I would learn anything new the second time around.  I will never question that again.  While a lot of the subject matter was a repeat, I was able to delve deeper into the content, and apply it to not just my business, but to my life.  In spades.

One of the main thrusts of the weekend was to get out of my comfort zone.  Funny, I had just written a post about that a couple of weeks ago (Scared Shiftless).  I must have been getting ready for this next step!

Of course Marty was there with me (another one of our adventures!) and we were able to have honest conversation about our friendship.  We did an exercise where we determined our personality type and what motivated each of us depending on our “colour”.   It was so freeing to be able to have a platform from which we could neutrally talk to each other about those little niggling things that we do through our own motivations (e.g. to feel good or avoid discomfort or rejection) and to find out how the other person experiences them.  In fact, it was clear that not understanding each other’s reasons for doing things got in the way of our growing friendship.  And that if they are named, it actually expands the relationship.

I came away from that weekend with a deeper connection with Marty and an understanding of some of the things I do that drive her nuts (and other people too no doubt)! It has helped me become more conscious in my everyday words and decisions, and I anchored my understanding of “how I do anything, is how I do everything”.

But it didn’t stop there.  Every day since then, I have been reexamining my modus operandi in relationships (both past and present) and found some golden nuggets. And here’s the scary part for me. I know that my relationships need freshening up and I can’t get away with a superficial glossing over of stuff just to keep them intact.  I need to get out of my comfort zone and come clean – whether it’s telling someone that the dynamic needs to change or telling someone that I love them and am grateful that they are in my life, or both!    

So I have personally declared March as “Relationship Spring Cleaning Month”.  Wherever I feel there is unfinished business or something that needs airing, I am getting out my cleaning supplies and starting to scrub.  I’m not leaving myself out of the equation.  I think a good deep cleansing for me would just add to the exhilaration I feel when I think of the relief of not having to sustain something that isn’t authentic.

What I have come to value the most in my relationships is a willingness to evolve, through thick and thin, through discomfort, and not just feeling good all the time at the expense of capital “T” truth.  I am now willing to lose relationships if I can’t be authentic within them.

Branded by a rose in my teeth (and a lampshade crown),

Authentically yours,

Buns xo

P.S.  If you want to find out more about David Wood here are the details... 

For your listening pleasure, here is another of my favourite songs...

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