Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Transaction: Sight Unseen

How come change is something that we don’t consciously focus on?  It’s as if we think it happens to us, without our consent and so it’s best to not think about it until it’s staring you in the face. Then you have no choice but to deal with it!  It seems to me that this approach generates stress and calls on coping skills, all based on a desire to control the situation and regain stasis.

 It’s funny right? Change is inevitable and a constant as long as we are alive. It’s the only thing to count on actually. You can count on nothing ever staying the same. And yet rather than choose to invite and open to the experience as part of our personal evolution we contract and steel ourselves to maneuver the unpredictable waters of change. Instead we wait for change to befall us and then we strategize.

If I am being honest, even when I open and embrace change there is always an element of fear.  Is it fear of the unknown or more a fear that I will lose what I DO know or have, in the process?

 It’s an important question to ask since it explains holding on, sometimes long after we know that change is called for. I have chosen in the past to live in the known, even accepting crumbs and justifying my situation by believing that I could live this way and simply be grateful for what I do have. And yet this choice takes a toll. We are meant to be fully fulfilled and accepting anything less impacts our emotional well being, our health and ultimately our ability to dream and go after our heart’s desire. Holding on for the sake of security or safety only brings one thing in the end. Exhaustion!  

So how do we create a healthy relationship with a force that is truly beyond our control? Well I don’t know about you but considering change will occur regardless I would rather work with it than against it.  Controlling anything is always a massive energy drainer so why not start with the premise that there is another way, a more fluid and flowing way.

You would certainly have to wake up and notice day to day choices you are making and determine whether they are in alignment with your values and with living authentically.

 Are you being truly honest and expressing in a real way…both with yourself and to others?  If you are pretending, smiling and wearing a mask then change has a predictable habit of kicking you in the butt when you least expect it. That’s your part of the dynamic. When you are sleeping your way through your life on autopilot, change occurs in order to wake you up. So getting on board with change would mean waking up all by yourself and not waiting for an external event to jar you from your placid slumber. You cannot change what you are unwilling to confront. Start with the commitment to live with eyes wide open. That is the demonstration that says. I am willing to embrace change with ease.

And now we circle back to fear. We close our eyes and avoid the truth when we are afraid. It’s a reflex action to take flight, numb out, ignore or deny. The fight directive too kicks in when anxiety and fear rears its head inside of us. Choosing a different way means standing still long enough to feel what is going on in every moment. Take in all the details that are occurring inside and outside of ourselves and then make a conscious choice based on the direction that you are in alignment with.  Setting your course in advance based on the kind of person you wish to be, allows you to relax and stay anchored to yourself no matter what is occurring.  Believing that change has your back and it is a good thing is essential.

Step one: awaken. Step two: determine direction based on values like being honest or joyful or free. Step three: hold on with a light touch and make space. You are not the only one here. The universe wants to play with you…in a good way.

 Change, which is a conduit of the universe has some ideas in mind that you may not have even thought of. Surrender control long enough to create an opening for something brand new to appear. How you navigate change will make the difference between surviving and thriving. I think this mindset is crucial from the start and then faith, trust that a process is occurring that has your best interests at heart is what allows you to perceive the wonders that want to come your way.

And remember the only difference between the experience of fear in the body and that of excitement is in what you are make it mean!

Branded by transition,

Authentically Yours


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